Hot argument ensued yesterday at the Agboyi/Ketu Customary Court between Mr and Mrs Adesola when the wife, Mrs Balikis Adesola, told the court that she caught her husband red-handed with her friend in a hotel while the husband opposed saying that his wife and her friend set him up.
The husband, Mr Adewale Adesola, had earlier brought a petition to the court to dissolve their five-year old marriage which is blessed with two children on the grounds of threat to life, lack of submission, lack of love and care and laziness.
Mr Adesola said that the love between them has been marred with too much drama and that he is tired of her constant harassment and lack of submission.
Mr Adesola said, “the annoying aspect of the relationship between us is that, every time we quarrel, she makes it a point of duty to destroy our property and inflict injuries on me. She doesn’t cook or fetch water and she is always too quarrelsome. She doesn’t respect my family members including my mother. On one occasion, my wife even locked me in the cell during one of our quarrels. We fought and the next morning, she went straight to the police station and I was arrested. I slept in the cell that night. This action of hers is the last I can take; I will no longer stay married to her. I will take care of my children but I have nothing to do with her.”
The president of the court, O.T Williams then asked the wife, Mrs Balikis to react to her husband’s allegation.
She heaved a heavy sigh and said, “The reason my husband wants to dissolve the marriage is not because of our fights, but because I caught him red-handed in a hotel with my childhood friend.
“My childhood friend stays very close to us and because we have a satellite dish, she comes sometimes to watch Yoruba movies and because we have been friends for a long time, she became close to my husband. One day, she came to me and told me that my husband always calls her unnecessarily and it has become very worrisome adding that she decided that it’s better she told me so that it won’t look like she’s condoning his behaviour. Then, one day, my husband sent her a text message that she should meet her at a certain hotel and she quickly came to me and showed me the text message; it was so unbelievable.”
At that point, the husband, Mr Adetola quickly interrupted saying that the wife and her friend set him up which caused an argument between him and the wife, as both of them accused each other of lying. The president warned him and told him to wait until the wife finished her own narration noting that if he had anything to say, the court would offer him the opportunity.
The wife then continued: “After I saw the message, I then decided that my friend should go and keep me updated so I could meet them at the hotel just to catch him red-handed. So, she called my husband and they arranged. On the day she was to visit, she told me and I stayed around the area. As soon as she got into the room, she quickly sent me the room number and I went to the hotel and entered the room.
Pretending that they asked me to get them food, the receptionist gave me permission and I went in. I knocked and he opened the door and he was very surprised to see me. We started fighting there in the hotel until the hotel management chased us out and he started claiming that he was set up. That was the genesis of all our problems. He said I don’t take care of him, but he is lying, he is a barber and the shop he uses was given to him by my brother before he travelled abroad. He only gives me N500 to cook but I augment it with my own money and sometimes, my mother assists me a lot in taking care of my children.
Meanwhile, his own mother will never assist us or even appreciate what I do for her son. She rather fights me and finds every wrong thing about me. Anytime I have a quarrel with my husband, she would come to the house and tell me to go and spend three months in my mother’s house. If I don’t go, she would disturb me until I go to my mother’s house. Instead of my husband to caution his mother, he will even encourage her to do whatever she likes to me. About destruction of property and inflicting injury on him, my husband is lying. Whenever a property is destroyed, it’s as a result of our fight. So, he can’t blame it on me.
The court then asked the husband to react to his wife’s allegation of catching him red-handed with her friend.
He still insisted it was a set up saying, “It is her friend that keeps calling me and she comes to the house and watch Yoruba movies until very late in the night. She will be giving me ‘some moves.’ Then one day, she told me that we should meet at a certain hotel and I was wondering why she would ask me to come see her in a hotel. So, I asked some of my friends of their opinion and they told me to go and see what she wanted. When I got to the hotel, I saw her downstairs and she came to me and said we should go up in a room as downstairs is so open and anybody could see us. It wasn’t up to five minutes that we got up to the room that my wife knocked on the door. As soon as I saw her, I just knew that they both set me up and that was how it happened.”
The president of the court said that, he could see that both of them were not prepared for marriage before they got into it. “They did not seek wisdom before they embarked on the journey,” he stated. He told them that they really need to think about the marriage and put into cognizance the two children they have. He said they should think back how they loved each other when they met and see whether that love can come to life even if it’s a little before the next adjournment.
The president adjourned the case till April 5, 2015 and reminded the couple that the customary court is not only meant for dissolution but also serves as a platform to resolve marriage crisis.